22.52 at the end of August

 Hmm lg gloomy pol tbtb (:

Mungkin akunya yg blum trbiasa atau bagaimana .. like .. it shouldnt going on :(

I never comparing anymore in my twenty i dont have anything to show etc but ah sudahlah perasaan gloomy overthing takut dst itu pastii ada banget di waktu-waktu tertentu. ya seperti malam ini. at least setaun belakangan ini i try and still keep to try to make some effort for better life better habits etc. idk maybe ini masih yaa still a small progress or how but the result i think never look like "cool". Iyaa emang harusnya aku tau sndiri siiik yaudaa at least i did my best gitu.. tapi humm why :(

Ok as usual i'll tell too what something that made me write here hehe. Yah tonight i got an announcement bout something like an online internship in a platform but i got rejected cause obviously i wasn't enough to reach their criteria soooo obviously too i was shifted by another applicants. and again several days ago i got my rejected too in the same way. and several days ago jugak i got my last rank in a design compete. like .. huhu is it my progress? why i didnt see my good result :(

Oh idk where i wanna tell so i just write all my feelings here :( and i think it's better too.

Hmm.. lately aku juga sering liat motivation video dr yutub dan sejenisnya terutama dr tokoh2 yang udah sukses like Mark Zuckerbeg, Jack Ma and etc and they always said that yaa failure is a normal. very very normal. failure too is a first step to be success :( dan aku masih inget banget kata2nya zuckerberg yang bilang bahwa jk rowlings sebelumnya juga got much rejected and failure sblum harry potter jadii popular in whole world, beyonce dgn ratusan lagunya yg gagal sebelum lagu helo, dan jack ma yang ditolak di 10 universitas sebelum mendirikan alibaba :(

Then.. huhu so now actually only a tiny failure for me right? :( i'll prove to anyone i'll be the winner . yah i'll prove to myself first if some failures that i got lately is very first step to get my win. my success. 

Bismillah besarkan hatiku ya Allah buat selalu pantang menyerah dan bangkit (: